Dream land

[Cottontofu]

Well I'm not sure that a pan is a suitable weapon to fight a zombie in an elevator...

[GhostsandDragons]

Copy-pasted from my tumblr:
I don't remember much anymore but I'm pretty sure there was some more stuff that I forgot that may have been important. (btw Sam and Bree are some of my IRL friends just to throw in a bit more context there.)

[Trifkin]

Whoa. o_o

[Trifkin]

I had a dream that I had jokingly mentioned marrying my friend's sister that I'd never met before, and her mother (who is Korean and also extremely good at wedding stuff) took it seriously (unbeknownst to me) and actually planned a ceremony and invited everyone we've ever known. So the day of our wedding I just kind of stumble through it all disbelievingly, sort of bemused since I know the ceremony won't be legally binding in our state anyway. But I get butterflies and start to take it seriously when I see my bride and she's looking amused but also shy and expectant. O-O So I marry this woman I don't know... The dream fast forwards a few years and we're in this sweet little two story house with two kittens and a ferret and have a wonderful relationship and two beautiful children. Apparently we each had one from the same donor. The dream ends with me bursting with happiness as I hug our oldest son while my loving wife hugs our youngest behind me.

Simultaneously happy and sad now. My heart aches a bit.

[negzee]

Sources on that?

I'm pretty sure I've read various things (mostly for work) in dreams that have caused confusion in the real world the next day. And I read signs and things all the time in dreams, but I'm guessing you meant the "sit down and read a book" kind of reading.

[noodles]

let me tell you about my dream last night

so i was attending a class at a college, and we were told there would be a substitute. all we had to do was some reading so it was no big deal. so it's a few minutes past the time we're supposed to start and this chimpanzee walks in, wearing a flannel shirt tucked into khaki pants

he goes up to the lectern and puts on some tiny reading glasses and looks over a clipboard for a minute while everyone is silent

then looks up and he's like BWEBWEBWEH. BWEBWEBWEH and gestured towards himself and grabbed a marker and started making a bunch of scribbles and swirls on the whiteboard while saying BWEHBWEH...BWEH....BWEBWEBWEH...BWEBWEH like he was writing something legible

eventually he took out the book we were supposed to read and we all turned to the page we were gonna start from that day, and was like squinting at it and reading from it in monkey speech and i looked up and saw he was holding the book upside down

he kept going on and eventually would finish a passage and scribble random shit on the board more and eventually this other guy came in

and he said I'M THE REAL SUBSTITUTE. NO ONE SAY ANYTHING, HE GOES NUTS IF YOU DON'T TAKE HIM SERIOUSLY"

[Trifkin]

That is actually a REALLY funny dream. XD

[PLA]

I dreamed that Super Best Friends Play was hosted by James May and Jeremy Clarkson.

[noodles]

I dreamed about the god of arthropods. Warning if you are easily squicked.


George Takei was doing a TV interview about how he had kept his youth and energy. He said it was because he ate chitin. Chitin is the hard shell part of an arthropod's exoskeleton, like the tail parts of a shrimp that you avoid eating. Takei was saying it had special health properties.

He got as much chitin as he needed because he had a farm of woodlice. But he would only rarely eat or kill any of the woodlice. He'd use special tweezers to pin the creatures down and slowly peel their shells off, scute by scute, leaving a frantically squirming and sometimes bleeding soft-bodied creature. He'd mash the chitin with a pestle until it was a powder he'd throw into a smoothie. George Takei would then let the horribly injured woodlouse retreat back into its cage where its shell would regrow over time, allowing him to peel it off again. He did this to dozens of the creatures every day. Once a louse had grown old and would not regrow its shell, he ate it, a squishy little treat.

He said that science showed arthropods couldn't feel pain, only "negative stimuli" they would immediately forget.

But the woodlice remembered.

There were so many of them that Takei never noticed a dozen or so disappearing into a crack in the wall of their cage every night to plan their revenge. The human wouldn't care even if he did know we could feel pain, they said. Let us bind the human and throw him to the beetles of the cave, some said, and let his bones be the warning to his people. No, said their leader, we will not kill the human. But we will teach him a lesson.

That night, the woodlice chanted an ancient spell, magic passed down through an oral history so ancient that it holds songs of the time before vertebrates stole the land.

Takei awoke, the size of a nickel.

Immediately he was assaulted by a trio of mosquitoes. The former Star Trek actor screamed and rolled, sure he was going to be skewered by one of their giant blood-sucking proboscises. But the mosquitoes only grabbed his arms and legs and began to carry him across the vast gulf of his bedroom, into a tiny crack in the wall. He was bound to the back of a woodlouse's shell by a strand of his own hair, and carried through the darkness between the walls.

He was dumped in a chamber lit by a now-giant candle. The woodlice were all around him, as well as other dwellers of the wall, cockroaches, spiders, termites, gnats, mites, fleas from his cat. They were looking not at him, but at the looming pillar of the candle. There was a thump that shook the wooden floor, followed by another, and the bugs all around bowed their heads to the best of their ability.

From behind the candle lumbered a creature, what would have been only four or five inches tall, now a colossus, standing on towering chitinous clawed legs of mottled blue and orange, with a thorax that raised up like a mantis supporting clawed arms. Its head was obscure, as the face of it was dominated with what looked like a giant flower like a rose, but the sickly orange and green coloration and fleshy texture made it look more like a fungus, blooming directly out of the brain. In the center of this fungal structure was an eyeball, human-like but unblinking, swiveling to lock gazes with the horrified former TV actor George Takei. From its chest, where its thorax met its abdomen, there emerged what was undoubtedly the upper body of a human skeleton the size of the now tiny George Takei, appearing from the flesh as if it was liquid. The creature began to speak, in a booming and rumbling voice that shook the walls, and the arthropods buzzes their wings or shook their antennae in reverence. As it spoke, the skeleton swung its arms and clattered its jaws to match the words. It said in a voice like waves pounding in a sea cave "You have been judged and deemed unworthy of existence" and the flies and crickets all buzzed and chirped in approval. George Takei sobbed and begged for his life. The creatures around him clacked their mandibles in hatred but the god lifted one of its arms and silenced them. It said, pointing with its human skeleton hand, that because it was a forgiving god, it would let him live, but if he ever touched one of its children again, he would surely die, for he was powerless before its might, and it had eyes and ears in every arthropod that flies or crawls. It turned its back and lumbered into the darkness, and its flock turned on George Takei, swarming over him, and he was sure he would be torn apart, but moments later, he woke in his bed, returned to normal.

There was something I could see that wasn't part of the narrative. The "god" was actually a collection of pieces of plastic and other things, and inside it was a team of bugs manipulating wires and pedals to control it, and speaking through a big horn for the voice. Some limbs were too narrow to hold wires, and were just filled with tiny mites that moved the body around with their own swarming masses.

[zamisk]

@__@

Noodles dreams are my favorite thing. Also, your writing is awesome.

[Trifkin]

[Cottontofu]

In case of a zombie outbreak, make sure to stock up on ice cream.

A couple days ago I dreamed about adopting a black kitty that I named Lucifer (and I really plan adopting a new pet in reality). Before getting to take care of this little guy, the Demon lord with the same name kills the mood and tries to take over the human world. I also encountered Rise from Persona 4 that was complaining about her boring and unsuccessful life, while being corrupted by Lucifer.

[Reynard-Miri]

My partner dreams better than I do. Text message from this morning:

"Morning. I dreamt I had to save a kingdom from American corporate greed. You were this lands king. I was your paladin. You and I quested to kill the greedy people. Then you asked me to be your queen."

[Hong]

So she dream of the future, then.

[Trifkin]

I would devour that novel in a heartbeat. Hell, I'd enjoy writing it.