Golden Deer Pub Community Forums

[spoiler]Of course. You'll never understand how I feel, but neither will I. I mean I want to. I want to know how that makes you feel, I wanna know what went through your head when I told you how I felt. Is that really so much to ask? I mean I should at least be given that much. Right? Or am I destined to never know the truth. I keep hoping that you went on an extended trip and that you forgot to tell me. I keep hoping that one day I will look and you will have told me something. That you apologize for the fact that you left without saying something. I would understand. I would understand completely. But it's been about 3 weeks and nothing. Maybe you just really don't care. But I don't know if you care or not. I want to though. I want you to ask me about me. How I feel. How I am. I'm not what most people think I am and I don't want you to think that I'm just like the rest. In some instances I am but how I feel is different. But you'll never know. You never bothered to ask me anything. You never cared and here I still am thinking about the past. Everything that happened. It's all gone. It'll never happen again. And that hurts. I sometimes wish I hadn't told you so that we could still be friends. But in an attempt to be honest with you and not hide anything from you, I lost you. Maybe it was meant to be. Maybe, since your not a very understanding person, we weren't meant to be friends. I don't care if you don't feel the same nor will I ever. I just wanna be able to talk to you like I used to. I can't sleep quiet well because of you. I keep thinking about you. I stay up and think and think and think. I don't even know why. But these feelings are all that are left. That is your mark. That is how you shaped me. By making me think and believe that I am a bad person. That I wasn't suppose to do what I did. That I ultimately don't belong. But the problem is still where I began: you've never bothered to ask me anything. You've never bothered to ask me so that I could you that I joined track solely for the purpose of hurdling. That I joined because I had wanted to do it since middle school. That after I had the accident I fell for you and I didn't feel the same about you after that. It was you who I thought about when I was in the hospital. But I was being selfish. I hoped that when I got back to school you would ask me if I was okay and you would help me. But I was way over my head. You continued your life as if you didn't know what had happened to me. You didn't care. I got carried away and this is probably the price I pay for thinking about you would care. And yet your smile is something I won't soon forget. You always smiled when I called your name because you knew I would ask something stupid. You knew who it was that was calling your name and you smiled. Why? Give me a reason why I shouldn't have loved the way you smiled. Honestly at one point all I did was stare at you from across the classroom. Stalker. No. Intrigued. Yes. I wanted to know more about you. Who you were, where you wanted to go, why you were here, and other stupid questions like those. But quiet frankly, I don't know if this is love. I'm confused. It started with a dream and I denied the fact that I liked you. But then I looked at you and I couldn't stop looking. I became addicted to you and I now know that it was a good thing we went down different paths. I was over thinking things and I should have stopped before I fell for you more. But I was being selfish and I wanted to keep looking at you. This is the price I pay for being who I am. Your back is turned to me and no matter how much I plead for you to turn around, you never will. I deserve this and I should just let you go. I shouldn't become the person I wanted to become in life because I know that if I follow that path, we'll meet at some point. And your face will only hurt me. I'm sorry if I put you through something. I was being selfish again. Next time I shouldn't be so rash. My feelings should be kept inside of me. And eventually they'll disappear. But I don't wanna let you go. I'm difficult. And at the same time I don't wanna do the things liked to do. I don't wanna continue running because I'm scared. I'm scared that one day we'll meet. That you'll see me or I'll see you and I don't want see you if indeed you don't care about me. It's as if I plan to give everything up for you. I don't want to but should I? Now what?[/spoiler]

The way a PSN account gets attached to a local PS3 user account irrevocably is very annoying. I learned this after I logged into my PSN account while logged into a PS3 as someone else. Good thing he only has a few game saves that he doesn't care about.

Mother. Fucking. Mosquitoes.

Colds suck. Especially getting them from a theme park.

OKAY! : D